The Dirty South Is SULLIED!

Sorry for not updating but I've have spent the last couple days in New Orleans... my first time in the south... FUCK THE SOUTH... I think it's because I have experienced that nice covert racism in the subtext shadows in lovely California, but it sucks to get stared at when walking down the street with your girlfriend of another race. What year is it down here?

1) Their are no ass-gaskets for the shitters... I know if I'm going to get Hepatitis I'm gonna get it, but at least give me the comfortable illusion that this thin piece of recycled paper will protect me from crotch rot!

2) WAY TOO MANY BLACK BUS BOYS! It bothers me when an older black dude picks up my plate and says a, "Y'all done, sir!" I wanna say no just to make the white server come back and pick it up.

3) I start thinking about the black folks here, WHY DIDN'T YOU GET THE FUCK OUT! It's one of those things where you want to grab the bus boy and say you can be better than this house nig white jacket wearing patsy. But then I have to understand there is a reason why the black folks who left... left and the ones who didn't... didn't, but from growing up in Cali it's hard to just let it go.

4) Bourbon St. is white trash central, if it was a radio station it would be hits of the 70's and 80's... Eagles, Bon Jovi, and Journey! A couple young people are scattered in, but it's awkwardly old and generic...

5) No one cards... maybe girlfriend and I are officially old, but damn! I never saw anyone carded... maybe that's the white trash aspect in practice money is money young or old!

6) Food is the ultimate equalizer no matter how awkward I felt walking around or listening to music... when everyone ate, EVERYONE ATE! The fattening, gluttonous, and indulgent food options are SOOOOOO GOOOD! It's the only time I'm wasn't stared at or whispered about, good food brings us all together...

ALL IN ALL, IF YOU AIN'T FROM THE SOUTH DON'T GO THERE... NOTHING FOR YOU THERE, EXCEPT GOOD FOOD...