Hella Proud

Not to minimize how tough it must have been for Anne Frank... but shit ain't easy being a bay area sports fan living in LA... Hiding in plain sight, while keeping my mouth shut as people talk about how the Dodgers are going to run the table or how Kobe will be better than Jordan! When wearing my Giants hat cholos downtown ask if I'm a Giants fan, I frantically tell them, "No I just love gangbangin' so much I had to go out and buy the Seven Four (SF) Hoovers hat!"

In all seriousness, Seven Four hoovers are a pretty legit gang, and have a way higher slugging percentage than the Gigantes.

After seeing my Giants get reamed by the Dodgers last week, and seeing the hopes of just a playoff run kindle and dwindle all in the span of a week... I must say that a bastion of hope still glimmers. This weekend I will be at the San Francisco Saloon amongst other Northerns rooting, hoping, praying that we can sweep this series!

Throughout the entire Annie Frank book I thought to myself, ANNE BABY BAUBE, TAKE OFF THE GOD DAMNED NECKLACE THAT TELLS EVERYONE YOUR JEWISH AND LIVE YO LIFE! But she didn't, she stayed in her attic, ate her stale attic bread, and lived her scary attic life... too proud to say I AM NOT A JEW! Well... I AM A GIANTS FAN! I AM A WARRIORS FAN! I AM A PANTHER FAN... yeah that last one is a leap but the Raiders are owned by the devil and the Niners fans eat fancy cheeses during the game.

I've been scoffed at by angels fans after our world series loss and have had my car window smashed in by Dodger fans after going to a Burrito truck (dodger fans take their baseball and burritos very seriously apparently). But that doesn't stop me from singing the praises of THE FREAK, KUNG-FU PANDA, and GILROY GARLIC FRIES... the later is not a clever player nickname, but it should be!

All in all, I see where little Annie Frank (wait is Frank even a jewish name? shouldn't it be Frankenberg or Frankenstein?) was coming from and respect for her overflows in me like a topped off Anchorsteam, but I will not let the hoards win, I will root for my teams like the Mensch I am, I WILL REPRESENT THE BAY TO THE FULLEST... unless those guys who broke my window show up again, then it's all about Seven Four Hoovers.

Gloriously Good!

Just saw "Inglourious Basterds" and LOVED IT. I hate misspelled movies titles, THIS MEANS YOU "Pursuit of Happyness", but this film has few negatives!
And here they are...
1) It was long in parts, Tarantino can get caught up in how well he can write dialogue. There are lot of great scenes with dudes sitting at a table going back and forth, but many of them really could of been shaved down. The audience could of been saved an extra 15 - 20 minutes easy.
2) Oh yeah, and someone please PUNCH Eli Roth in the NUTS. Yes, I'm one of the few people who loved "Cabin Fever" and his killer fruit animation thingie five years ago, but now that he's Tarantino's boy he's bigger than his britches. His one major scene in the woods is ruined cause he can't get an accent down.

NOW ON TO THE POSITIVES
1) Christoph Waltz is AMAZING. One of the most layered performances by an actor in a Nazi uniform since the the guy who shot Jacob The Liar in the face (and we all cheered, I mean Jew or not, he was a fucking liar, not cool!) The script is written so over the top, yet Waltz is able to bring hilarity in tow with anger, fear, and even likability!
2) Brad Pitt meshes Billy Bob Thorton in Sling Blade with John Wayne... and it works beautifully! Brad Pitt is one of America's best actors and is not celebrated for his talents as much as his looks, which is a varsity travesty... yeah I made that shit up, makes sense to me...
3) Robert Richardson shoots another beautiful film, great color contrasts and always meticulously framed.
4)The ending is perfect and leaves the audience with a great/disgusting taste in their mouths (Tarantino at his best).
5) The characterizing of Hitler as a near heart attack old bumbling (at times) lunatic is a brilliant stroke!
6) Shosanna's story bookends beautifully. Plus, I like the choice of her love interest being another type of "undesirable" in this world.
7) The German propaganda film is perfectly made with it's terrible stunts and over the top acting.
8) Mike Myer's cameo is oddly interesting, cause we can't help but laugh because of his persona. It seems as if he can't help but make this stupid open mouth smirk thingie. The whole scene really makes little more sense than "this is cool for cool's sake" (especially in retrospect), but in this zany world it doesn't bother me much. It's actually kind of a good break from the more drawn out scenes.
9) Most of all, I love how everyone is free game in a Tarantino film, Krauts, Negros, Hairy Jews, you name it! Denzel gave Tarantino shit a decade ago for using the word "nigger" too much, and yes sometimes it's jarring, but overall everyone is demeaned... so I feel it's all fair play. The only thing that is kind of bothersome is when you see the audience reaction to certain racial jokes, yes white guy in front of me YOU LAUGH AWKWARDLY TOO LOUD AT BLACK JOKES!
10) All in all it's a FUCKING AMAZING TIME OUT, but GO IN WITH NO EXPECTATIONS... don't you hate when people say that shit...